A Filmmaker’s Call to Vote in the EU Elections – blog #3
31 May 2024
With only days to go until the European elections (6-9 June 2024, check the dates for your country here), the Federation of European Screen Directors (FERA) brings you a blog series penned by working filmmakers from our board.
The contributions aim to highlight the significance of voting in the European elections and their impact on our shared future. Through their unique perspectives and experience in storytelling, the filmmakers explore the vital role that these elections play in shaping policies, culture, and the artistic and creative landscape across Europe. With this series, we hope to inspire a deeper understanding of and active participation in the democratic process within our community and beyond. Join us on this journey. #Use your vote #Use your voice
Kinofuturama: How often can these Giant Enemies return?
By Elisabet Gustafsson (SE) and Jean-François Fontanel (FR), Filmmakers and FERA Executive Committee members
It’s Sunday afternoon, somewhere in Europe. Well actually, it’s not just any random Sunday. It’s the 9th of June 2024. Agneta and Jean-Marc are two good friends and Jean-Marc has come to Agneta’s apartment to take her to the cinema. But Agneta hesitates. She has just unpacked her brand new 62 inches OLED screen. “It consumes 54% less energy than my previous TV – we’ll be eco-friendly!” she says with great enthusiasm. As a true cinephile, Jean-Marc shakes his head: no, no, she can’t be serious! “Watching a film on TV?! Art and cinema can’t be rated with numbers!”. Agneta knows she has lost another art battle as she watches Jean-Marc walking out, leaving the door open. She sighs deeply, already missing her couch.
Agneta joins him standing in front of the entrance of Kinofuturama, as he’s watching a film poster: Kong vs Panda, Episode 12: The 3rd Return of the Giant Enemies of the Space of the State. “Number 12?” says Jean-Marc scratching his hair. Agneta wonders how many times the Giant Enemies can return. They are interrupted by a smiling Chinese-American man who pops up in front of them. His shiny name badge announces “Xi Donald”. He is brim-full of energy with a salesman’s spirit. To his surprise, Agneta and Jean-Marc haven’t seen the previous 11 films, despite being epic masterpieces full of stunning special effects. And this one is even better, can you imagine?! he claims. Jean-Marc wants to know who the director is. “Who cares?” Xi Donald replies, and continues that they have algorithms that tell them all they need to know about film consumers. But Agneta refuses to participate in a system that cannot create films without destroying the planet. Xi Donald has his sales pitch all set: “This masterpiece has been made by the most eco-friendly studio in the world! No trucks, no trailers, no lights, no cameras, no transportation, no construction, not even cast…! Just super low-power consuming computers managed by the best AI on the market!” Agneta is getting more seduced by his seemingly eco-friendly speech. This way of making films could reduce CO2 emissions by… several kilos… this might be the future! To prevent her from being manipulated by this charismatic preacher, Jean-Marc pulls her away, whispering: “I’m sure he’s Death disguised as a shit-movies seller. And I’m not ready to play chess!”
They turn around to face a sunny pastel poster, showing smiling people dancing and laughing in a field: The never-ending love and happiness of the most beautiful family in the world. “Is this ironic?” Agneta wonders. Jean-Marc goes to read the reviews attached at one of the windows to find out who directed it. She’s still staring at the poster when a smiling joyful woman, dressed like a 1950’s farmer’s wife appears in front of her. “Ironic? Don’t you want to watch a film full of happiness, authentic traditions, European culture and come out of the cinema full of joy?” Jean-Marc overhears the words “European culture” and “authentic” and runs back, eager to ask the farmer woman directly. The director? The woman is surprised by the question and underlines that it’s the message that is important. Sincerely intrigued, Jean-Marc wants to know more about this authentic European message while Agneta tries to pull him away by the sleeve from the preaching Amish-look-alike. The woman means European traditions and family values of course. “And after the film” she says, lowering her voice and smiling, “you will perhaps feel an irrepressible desire to give Europe white beautiful happy new-born kids… only if you’re married of course!” Then she continues, slowly walking towards them while she speaks: “Do you prefer films where the audience feel existential anxiety and where their countries are invaded by cultures incompatible with ours and that will eventually destroy it?” Agneta is now determined to escape. “We’ll think of it and maybe come back tomorrow… cause after all, tomorrow is another day!” she says, proud of showing Jean-Marc she also has film references.
The farmer woman is about to catch them when they are suddenly and luckily saved by a nice melody sung by a group of 27 children behind them:
“In cinemas dim, where stories unfold
European cinema, a treasure to behold.
Through laughter, tears, and moments intense
It’s a kaleidoscope of human experience.
So, let’s venture forth, to the cinema’s gate
Where European stories eagerly wait.
Let’s support the art that knows no bounds
In European cinema, beauty resounds.
For in the dark of the theatre’s hall
We find unity amidst it all.”
In perfectly synchronised voices they all invite the couple to enter the third door and watch a film. Full of newly gained joy, and not to our surprise, Jean-Marc asks who is the director. All 27 reply unanimously: “You mean who are the directors? We’re talking about 27 films selected each week with care to offer you the most diverse 24 frames per second experiences! Every one of these films are made by directors who have something personal to tell us. And you’re free to choose any of them and come back tomorrow to watch another one.” One of the children steps up in front. “And you’ll get a free dish representing the country of the film you will watch – culture means growing – it’s nourishing!”. Agneta finds this irresistible, Jean-Marc too, and they quickly decide to go in.
But just before entering the auditorium, the 27 children stop them just to check that they have voted. “Today is the 9th of June 2024.” Agneta and Jean-Marc look at each other. “It’s the last day of European elections!” Both of them start excusing their lack of engagement in the EU election. Agneta was busy with her screen delivery and Jean-Marc claims that all elections are rigged in advance anyway. The 27 children look up towards the embarrassed adults, shaking their heads. Two of them take away the plates with the locally produced dishes. “Sorry, but if you don’t vote, you only have the choice between Kong vs Panda and The Happy Farmer Family!” the 27 children announce as they all enter the auditorium and close the door behind them.
Jean-Marc and Agneta are left on the stairs, disappointed with dropping jaws. Oh no! Agneta takes a quick look at her watch, Jean-Marc at the two film poster options with disgust. They look at each other with a quick smile, before running off to find their nearest voting booth.
DON’T FORGET TO VOTE IN THE EU ELECTIONS!